A happy bitless black horse standing with a compassionate equestrian horse trainer in a field at sunset.

You deserve to discover the magic of working in alignment with your horse supported by a coach who prioritizes science, soul, and self.

Enter my next era

The Magic in the Mission

At The Positive Pony, I believe in fostering harmony between humans and horses. Through a blend of scientifically sound methods, soulful connection, and personal introspection, I guide individuals to discover true alignment in their relationship with their equine partners. My mission is to nurture a space where empathy, scientific understanding, and self-discovery converge, empowering both humans and horses to thrive in a balanced, compassionate partnership.

Offerings

Equilescence℠
Lessons

Not your mama's "natural horsemanship" lessons! Equilescence℠ is The Positive Pony's signature process of growing in partnership with horses using the guiding stars of science, soul, and self.

In-person and virtual options available.

Explore Equilescence℠

Horse + Human
Energetic Alignment

You've got the skills and the support, but there's something not quite adding up in your relationship with your horse. Let's explore and realign any energetic blocks that might be affecting your connection at its core.

Virtual offering.

Animal
Communication

Discover your horse's inner world! I energetically connect with your horse, bridging the gap between you to answer your questions about their thoughts, feelings, and perspectives on life.

Virtual offering.

Current Offerings

Equilescence℠
Lessons

Not your mama's natural horsemanship or clicker training lessons! Equilescence℠ is The Positive Pony's signature process of growing in partnership with horses using the guiding stars of science, soul, and self.

In-person (Vermont and NE New York) and virtual options available.

Explore Equilescence℠

A happy black horse kisses a compassionate horse trainer in a white dress in Vermont

"Working with you is a pleasure for both human and horse. You are able to step back, evaluate both through the R+ lens. The non-invasive approach to meet the needs of both human and horse is remarkable which produces positive gains in obtaining individual short and long term goals. My horses and I appreciate your heart, spirit, and knowledge."

Jess, VT

Follow us on Instagram @thepositivepony

20 years...

20 years of hands-on experience made up of weekly riding lessons, equestrian federation certifications, natural horsemanship training, 4-H, and competitions, and not one mention of the difference between reinforcement and punishment.

I'm not blaming those programs or my mentors. Chances are, they truly didn't know better.

But when I stumbled upon positive reinforcement training because my mare, Annie, demanded I add new tools to my toolbox, I fell down a rabbit hole that was so much bigger than I ever could have imagined.

I, like so many of you reading this, had never been exposed to the information that being in the R+ community exposes you to.

Heck, I didn't even know that I had been using negative reinforcement (and quite frankly, positive punishment) for all of those years.

I did know, however, that my main riding instructor was different than others. Her horses lived out 24/7 as a mixed herd and always had access to hay. They were significantly happier and sounder than any other horses I had encountered at the time, but it wasn't until I put two and two together as I learned more *why* that was.

Now, with years of learning, practicing, and teaching others about how to use R+ with horses as my main training focus, I still run into situations (typically with boarded horses) that, when we examine the whole picture to determine how to best help the horse in front of us, would benefit from the use of R-.

And what I have discovered time and time again is that my experience and knowledge gained from diving into R+ has positively shaped my ability to use R-.

I use significantly less pressure, release quicker, and get results even faster without pushing a horse over threshold (because I actually know wtf that is now, how to read subtle signs of stress, and how to de-escalate a horse safely!).

All because of R+.

This isn't to say that I'm not eternally grateful for my 20+ years of experience and how it has gotten me here today, but rather that I wish all of the information that is foundational within the R+ community was more widely accepted and shared so that we all could be better horse people sooner.

Our horses deserve at least that. ✨

I will never accept someone telling me that horses should not have access to forage during bodywork EVER AGAIN.

I cannot tell you how many times I have heard well-known equine bodyworkers preach about how important it is not to feed your horse during bodywork sessions. And for a long time, I believed them.

I could rationalize their reasoning.

They often say that the horse needs to be fully present during bodywork, without the potential interference of food, so the practitioner can get a true read on the horse's responses.

I also understand that, from a behavioral perspective, this type of work is not really about operant conditioning.

Vet care, farrier visits, and bodywork rely more heavily on classical conditioning and the emotional associations the horse forms while the work is happening.

Sure, you can and absolutely should prepare your horse for these types of visits and practice behaviors that will set them up for success, but we all know that does not replace the actual experience itself.

Because of this, I figured positive reinforcement was not the star of the show, specifically when it comes to bodywork, and that it made sense to leave food out of the equation at the direction of "the experts."

But at the same time, that never fully aligned with my own experience.

I've successfully used forage during vet and farrier appointments and seen first-hand how horses can stay engaged while eating.

So why is bodywork so different?

Spoiler alert... it's not!

Check out my latest blog (link in bio!) where I go deep on why access to forage wins every time and why I'm calling BS if someone tells you otherwise. ✌🏼

When Annie went lame last fall, I had no idea how long the road ahead would be.

What we thought might be something simple turned into months of vet visits, rabbit holes, bodywork, and questions that didn’t have easy answers.

Eventually, (and accidentally) we discovered the sobering truth. Annie had fractured her left iliac wing.

It’s been a year of patience, heartbreak, and quiet hope. Through it all, my black magic mare never lost her spark. And now, her latest ultrasound showed the progress we have hoped for: significant healing. Not yet perfect, not quite finished, but healing nonetheless.

She’s made it clear that she's not done here, and neither am I.

I hope you'll read the full story (so far) on the blog. Link in bio. 🖤✨

Skill or relationship? More like chicken or egg! 🐣

As more horse people shift their focus to building a relationship with their horse first, traditionalists often jump on their soapboxes to remind everyone that skills must come first.

It’s no wonder this debate exists—most of us humans love a step-by-step formula. We want a clear order of operations to achieve our equestrian dreams, tangible or intangible. And so, the debate begins: relationship first or skills first?

Here’s the thing—trying to separate the two is like trying to unscramble the chicken-or-egg conundrum.

Building a relationship, whether with horses, people, your work, or the world, takes skill. But we also refine those skills through the relationship.

The skills you develop shape the relationship you create, and the relationship you want shapes the skills you pursue. It’s a loop, not a line.

For me, I aim to build relationships with my horses that are mutually rewarding, grounded in shared trust and safety. To do that, I choose to develop skills that align with that vision—and in turn, those skills shape the very relationship I’m striving to create.

On the flip side, many well-meaning horse people develop skills that lead to obedience. This often creates a dynamic where the human says, “Do this!” and the horse replies, “You got it!” That dynamic reflects the type of relationship the person prioritized in the first place.

See how it’s all connected?

The same goes for separating learning theory from emotional systems. No matter how neatly you try to divide them, they’re always intertwined.

Every interaction with your horse is a moment where your skills and relationship evolve together. They’re not separate silos or a one-then-the-other kind of thing.

It’s all connected, whether you like it or not. ✨

It may not always feel like it, but I promise it is. ✨

Yesterday, I was honored to guest lecture for a second time at the University of Vermont for their Equine Training Techniques course.

Not only did the professor have a clear shift in her understanding of equine behavior in the last two years, but she didn't have another trainer back after previous students expressed that he made them uncomfortable with how he handled the horses.

After my presentation, she also committed to purchasing clickers and forage pellets for her students who were interested in continuing their R+ journey.

The students I taught confidently knew that horses say "no" not to create problems for us, but rather because they might be in pain, confused, or afraid.

We worked with three wildly different horses and easily taught them how to safely accept food rewards before demonstrating how we could use R+ to address each of their sticking points from leading, catching, and haltering, to tacking up, separation anxiety, and hoof handling.

But one moment really stands out to me that wasn't necessarily about R+.

Due to metabolic concerns, our first demo horse wears a grazing muzzle. When a student brought out his halter with the muzzle to turn him back out, he quickly but quietly let me know he was concerned. His body language and energy dulled, and he stopped accepting food.

It was subtle, but I knew it was a really important teaching moment.

I held his halter loosely by my side, taking slow, deep breaths with a soft posture and a soft gaze directed toward the ground to let him know that I wasn't going to force him through this.

When he let out a big deep breath, I offered him the halter and waited for him to lower his head into it. It took a moment, but he rewarded me for my patience and attunement to his concern.

We then discussed how often we rush around, missing our horse's subtle communication, therefore missing these opportunities for connection.

It wasn't "woo," but it was magical and we all felt it.

We shared a moment of what working with horses can look like, no matter the reinforcer, so long as you are willing to slow down and listen to them before they have to yell.

💖

Here's a wild idea!

Equestrian professionals shouldn't put prospective students down for learning from various sources, especially while simultaneously telling them not to idolize a single person.

Let your horse and your intuition guide you ✌🏻

One of the phrases my grandmother burned into my brain is, "Patience is a virtue." 🌱

And I was a terribly impatient child so I heard it a lot! 😅

She may not have been a horsewoman, but she taught me so many lessons that would make me think otherwise. Practicing patience was certainly one of them.

Equilescence℠, my sacred term for the continuous process of growing together in partnership with horses, requires a level of patience with ourselves and our horses that isn't for the faint of heart.

I'm being called to embody a deeper sense of humbleness and composure as I establish my new relationship with Bird, who seems to have decided that my husband is actually his person. Which is great, except I do most of the day-to-day and technical horse work!

Welcoming any new animal into your life is the equivalent of an arranged marriage that they didn't necessarily agree to. That makes it our job to learn to understand them just as much as they have to learn to understand us.

The language that evolves between two beings is so personal that it takes an almost insane amount of patience to learn. Sure, some concepts overlap so you can hold a basic conversation, but it takes time to profoundly understand each other through all the nuances communication provides.

So what's my first step in building a relationship with a new horse?

✨ Simply *be* with them. ✨

Spend time together without asking for anything—no training, no desire for an outcome. Just observe.

Watch how they interact with and react to their surroundings without judgment or expectations. Take note of anything that brings up for you.

I've been spending a lot of time observing Bird in the weeks since he's been home and it's fascinating to take stock of his strengths and vulnerabilities.

I have some things I'd like to address in the future, but for now, my goal is to cultivate an environment where he feels safe, both physically and emotionally. Giving him plenty of time to settle in with no ulterior motives helps create that safety.

I promise you that rushing won't build connection, but patience will. And that's true at every step in growing together in partnership with our horses. 💖

"Out with the old, in with the new" is really hitting different these days.

I was talking to my best friend the other day about how I was struggling to post pictures of our new life because I was worried about what other people would think about my at least 150-year-old, less than "Instagram-worthy" barn.

Admittedly, I knew she would remind me what's most important (and of course she did). My barn isn't what you see in magazines, but her bones are beautiful in that "they don't make 'em like you anymore" type of way.

Having my horses home and having a property that met their needs has been my dream my entire life, and I achieved it at 30 years old. Where the heck is the shame in that just because it doesn't look like a cookie-cutter prefab barn?

So I started to speak to my barn as if she were my grandmother.

My Meme was my hero. A woman who always gave more than she took, but knew her limits and her boundaries.

Like everyone and everything, she slowed down with age. She needed more help. She wasn't as traditionally beautiful. But that does not mean she didn't still matter.

She was so full of life, wisdom, and love long before her body failed her. I cannot imagine how much we would have missed out on had she been hidden away once she retired, once she could no longer care for herself.

She still gave so much and was just as worthy of adoration despite the sag in her skin and the slowness of her movements.

I realized that my strong, old barn deserves the same outward, make sure the world knows she was here type of love from me that I gave my grandmother.

She may not be as beautiful as she once was, but she provides Bird and Annie a safe shelter they can access on their terms, stalls if needed, abundant hay storage, room for our feed, tack, and supplies, plus running water and electricity.

We still have plenty of settling in to do here and that has been the priority over social media, but I promise not to hide this place away like I realized I have been out of fear of judgment. If it happens, it was going to happen anyway and that isn't on me.

At the end of the day, if Annie, Bird, my husband, and I are safe and happy here, that's all that matters. 💖

This post has been a long time in the making for all the best reasons! ❤️

A short while back I teased y'all that I had an absolutely magical story to tell you, but it was not yet into the right chapter to share it.

However, that time has finally come!

A month ago, on June 27th, my husband and I bought our dream property. The next day I brought Annie home for the first time ever.

I quietly named our land Black Phoenix Farm.

I knew I wanted to honor Annie in the name, after all, my magical black mare who has been the catalyst for so much deserves to live on forever here. I also wanted to honor the previous owner (who is a friend of mine), which is where Phoenix comes in.

Her moving into the next chapter of her life felt like a rebirth, and she truly was rising from the ashes. I also greatly appreciate the beauty of the phoenix's story, the mythical aspect of it felt very much in alignment with what this place is and will be.

After naming the farm in secret, and ultimately deciding that a boarder was not the right option at this moment in time, I quietly put out feelers for a companion for Annie to meet all of her basic needs - forage, freedom, and friends.

Enter Bird. 💙

A friend of a friend had a Quarter Horse gelding who sounded like the perfect match for us. Goofy, confident, sweet, safe, and able to keep up with Annie.

In discussing him, his owner mentioned that she had given him the name Fire Bird for his coloring... and for the phoenix. At this point, only a small handful of people knew my farm name, and she was not one of them. I quite literally had found the Phoenix to complete Black Phoenix Farm.

So this past weekend, on July 27th, Bird joined our herd after a truly cosmic chain of events.

I have never seen two horses bond as quickly as Bird and Annie have. They have already shared some amazing moments across a spectrum of energy and intimacy - from running and playing to napping and mutually grooming.

There's so much more to the story, but you'll have to check out my blog to read it!

But with that said, please join me in welcoming Bird and celebrating the birth of Black Phoenix Farm. 💖

That includes your horse! 🦄

I noticed that I was bothered by something I had read the other day that said everyone in a group felt a certain way.

Normally, that wouldn’t irritate me, except I was part of said group, and I did not feel the way that was described at all. 😬

This got me thinking about how often some people assume or dismiss how another is feeling in order to protect themselves from being uncomfortable.

It’s a lot easier to believe that your horse is happy or your friend is fine, but how do you know if you haven’t asked them and really listened?

Maybe they are happy and fine!

But unless you explicitly ask about their feelings and are open to receiving their response, even if it isn't what you want to hear, it's unfair to make assumptions because it’s more convenient for you.

You also can’t change how someone else feels simply because you don’t agree or it upsets you.

I've heard way too many people say to others and to their animals “you shouldn’t feel that way.”

Who the heck are you to decide that?

If your horse is scared or your friend is angry, it doesn’t matter if you don’t think they should be.

You don’t have to agree with them, but it also isn’t your place to tell them what they should or should not be feeling.

So what can you do instead? 🤔

Ask!

Horses will tell you how they’re feeling whether you ask or not when you know what to look for in their body language and behavior, but you can still ask them questions about how they feel about things and gauge their responses.

And you can most definitely ask other people. They may not be fully honest if they don’t feel 100% safe, but you have to at least give them the opportunity.

In any case, if you want to make a statement about someone else’s feelings, it’s your responsibility to ask first and listen to their response with an open mind and open heart, not to assume, ignore, invalidate, or argue their feelings to fit your own agenda. ✌🏻

And social media loves controversy! 😬

Posts that cause controversy are what generate the most engagement. They feed into our natural tendency to strongly agree or disagree with something that we care about. 🗣

And people really love feeding into this on the internet, either as a creator or commenter, because there's often very few real-world repercussions.

The horse side of social media is no different.

You're probably being shown content that is likely to cause you to engage with it (even just watching it counts!), for better or worse, because of how you've interacted with similar content before.

The more you feed into something, the more you'll see it. Both on the internet and in real life.

Our brains naturally track patterns. It's hardwired into us for survival. It serves a lot of useful functions, but also plenty of not helpful ones in terms of modern-day living.

When you focus on the bad stuff, your brain is primed to look for more bad stuff.

But the good news is that the opposite is also true!

When you focus on the good stuff, your brain is primed to look for more good stuff.

That's why people who regularly practice gratitude, focus on glimmers, and shift their internal + external vocabulary away from negative words and towards using more positive words are more likely to have better baseline mental health.

Hence, you are what you love. If you "love" the negatives, they'll become the go-to track for your thoughts and actions. The same is true if you "love" the positives.

This isn't to say we should wall ourselves off and ignore everything that isn't exactly how we would want it to be, but rather to say we have a lot more control over the inputs in our life that can drag us down to an unhealthy place of burn out, depression, and apathy.

One thing you can do right now to make a change is to weed your feed. 🌱

The hide, mute, unfollow, unfriend, and block buttons are your friends!

Follow and lift up more of the people who inspire you, share a growth mindset, and foster safe spaces.

You're likely spending more time on the internet than at the barn, so you might as well make it a place that you love almost as much as you love your horse! 🦄

I am making my stand against the word "horsemanship"! 🫡

Fun fact about me: I take my vocabulary VERY seriously, and I do my best to choose my words with intense scrutiny. You'd best believe this also applies to my work with horses.

While in my rest and repair phase of 2023, I found myself rejecting the word "horsemanship." It feels so ambiguous and diluted, meaning something different to nearly everyone. It also doesn't seem to accurately represent my way of being with horses.

I was pleasantly surprised to learn that there are plenty of you who also agree the word isn't cutting it for you anymore either, but we didn't have another word to use in its place. Until now!

I spent a lot (probably an insane amount 😅) of time digging through the dictionary and researching etymology to find something that truly felt good to my soul.

That feeling was sparked with "coalesce." It then ignited into a raging fire when I first spoke "equilescence" into existence. 🔥

As I define it, Equilescence℠ is the continuous process of growing together in partnership with horses. It can take so many forms, but the core focus is on individual and shared growth between horse and human. 🌿

Equilescence℠ stems from the Latin prefix of "co," meaning together, "alescere," meaning to grow or to be nourished, and "equine" from "equus/equi" - a horse, of course!

I privately shared this new alternative with a few people who also resonated with its power, and I knew this was it. This is the word that will replace horsemanship for me moving forward.

My main coaching offering is now centered around lessons in Equilescence℠. These in person and virtual lessons in everything from management to riding follow the least intrusive, minimally aversive (LIMA) model, prioritize species appropriate care as a foundation for success, and are co-created with each individual human and horse partnership to achieve their unique goals using my guiding stars of Science, Soul, and Self.

If you'd like to learn more about one-on-one Equilescence℠ coaching, check out the link to my website in my bio and fill out my Alignment Assessment to ensure we're a good fit before we invest in each other. 💖

In honor of the first day of spring, I'm excited to (finally!) unveil the newest evolution of The Positive Pony! ✨️

After burning myself out in the first half of last year and then losing my first dog the day before my birthday in July, I retreated from social media to allow myself to rest and heal. To simply be and do without the pressure of creating content.

In that time, I found myself rejecting the word and vague idea of "horsemanship." It has become too diluted for me, and I don't feel it reflects what I embody. More on this later, so stay tuned! 👀

In my quest for finding the right words to describe what I do, I felt called to shed a lot of what was no longer serving me as a horsewoman and as a human. This included my previous branding.

I knew in my heart that Nica was the perfect person to help me bring my vision to life. Her art has always been inspirational to me, and I've valued the spaces we have shared in various containers beyond words. I knew she would understand exactly what I'm doing and how I'd hope to share it. I could not have been more right!

Nica's work beautifully represents my intimate and transformational relationship with Annie, nods at my preference for positive reinforcement and mindful communication with horses, and seamlessly illustrates my guiding stars of science, soul, and self.

So, without further ado, I give you the culmination of my vision for the feel of The Positive Pony moving forward! Make sure to check out the link in my bio to see the new website in all of her glory - you might even find something totally new there, too! 😉

Pushing is getting you to the wrong place faster. 💣

Most of you probably know by now that if you want your horse to load onto the trailer and they are scared, you should not ignore that and force them on anyway (unless it is truly an emergency - and no, sorry, that show, clinic, trail ride, etc. doesn't count no matter how much you paid for it!)

Instead, you find the point where your horse starts to let you know they are worried and break down the process from there when you are not on a time crunch.

But what happens when you reach that tipping point yourself? 🤔

Do you allow yourself to move slowly and empathetically through the same process?

I'm guessing the answer is probably not! 👀

It is so easy (like way too easy) to push past your feelings in pursuit of a goal because we live in such an outcome-driven society.

So here's where I invite you to reject the push and embrace the nudge. ✨

⏩ The push is aggressive, hasty, and insensitive.

▶ The nudge is quiet, methodical, and mindful.

⏩ The intent behind the push is toward the end goal.

▶ The intent behind the nudge is toward the next step.

They both move you forward, but the focus is different.

The space between you and your goal is either ignored or embraced.

So I ask why, in a world where you could nudge, do you keep pushing?

If this resonates with you and you would like someone to help nudge you toward your next step in a way that feels aligned with you and your horse, I would love to chat with you. 💖

If I could go back to the start of my compassionate horsemanship journey and do one thing differently, it'd be this...

👉🏻I'd stop trying to control my horse's emotions.👈🏻

Horses and humans are blessed with a variety of emotions for a reason, and yet we are often expected to do all we can to avoid or suppress all of the ones deemed "negative."

😡 Anger
😤 Frustration
😨 Anxiety
😱 Fear
😞 Sadness

And that's just the common few.

Most equestrians I work with have experienced this suppression first hand, or feel a lot of shame around causing or potentially causing their horse to feel one of these not so fluffy feelings.

But the thing is, you can't simply force yourself, someone else, or your horse feel a certain way! 🤯

Think about it.

You can do everything in your power to make someone love you, but if they're not feeling it, then it won't happen.

In fact, you may even cause them to feel the opposite if what you think will make them love you is not even remotely close to what actually sets the stage for them to experience love.

If you're seeking a deeper connection with your horse, you need to be prepared to accept the full spectrum of their and your own emotions.

You can (and should!) do what you can to set the stage for you both to feel your best while you're together, but at the end of the day, you and your horse are going to feel what you feel.

Sometimes that's good, and sometimes that's not so good, but it should all be welcomed as information and a chance to get to know each other better.

If you're not willing to allow yourself to hold space for the full range of emotions as they come up for you and your horse over the life of your relationship (because they will!), then you will never find true connection. ✨️

And if you've ever wished you could get marriage counseling for you and your horse, DM me, and let's chat! I'm passionate about helping horses and their humans find alignment in their relationships through the guidance of science, soul, and self. 🫶🏻

I took a poll in my stories recently and the results broke my heart. 💔

Out of just under 200 people, 91% responded that at least some of the time they decide against posting a photo or video of their horse or themselves on social media because they are afraid they will be judged for how they look.

47% said they choose not to share because of this fear all of the time. 😞

The amount of DMs I got from that poll was insane. So many of you shared your negative social media experiences with me and feel that not posting is the only way to avoid it happening again.

That is not the type of horse community I want to nurture. 🙅🏻‍♀️

🚩 You should not have to be afraid to share the picture of your senior or rehabbing horse who doesn't look their best right now but is incredibly well cared for otherwise and genuinely happy out of fear that someone will call you out for neglecting them.

🚩 You should not have to be afraid to share a video of yourself riding the horse you raised from a baby, started gently and at an appropriate age, out of fear that people will comment on your body's size even though it is not inappropriate for the horse.

🚩 You should not have to be afraid to share the photo of your alert horse taken while they were looking at something new before they had a chance to acclimate out of fear that you will be vilified for ignoring their subtle stress signals.

By no means am I saying that we should ignore actual abuse, turn a blind eye to professionals/authorities in the horse industry with patterns of ignorance or deflection, or not offer compassionate help to those who are actually asking for it.

What I am saying, however, is that the everyday equestrians I've met are all doing their very best for their horses with the knowledge and resources that they have. They do not deserve to be crucified as some have been for wanting to share their journey with their horse on their social media accounts.

If the intent behind the negative comments or unsolicited advice is in the name of equine welfare, then I am left to wonder how much their welfare would improve if their people felt just as safe and supported as we want the horses to be. ✌🏻

Just like you, your horse is not their job. 🦄

I immensely dislike the question that nearly every horse guardian is regularly asked... "So what do you do with them?" 🙄

The "appropriate" response here is often to dilute your entire relationship with your horse down to a discipline.

Sure, your chosen discipline can certainly be essential to note in some situations (such as if you're asked by a saddle fitter or bodyworker in order for them to better help you), but what you "do" with your horse is such a narrow view of them as an individual and of your partnership as a whole.

We ask the same question and expect the same type of response from other people, too.

Q: What do you do?
A: Respond with the title of the job that pays your bills.

But here's the thing.

You don't love your best friend or spouse because of their job - that isn't who they are.

The same goes for our horses!

I don't love Annie because of what she can do. I love her because she is genuinely affectionate, profoundly sensitive, unabashedly powerful, and incredibly silly.

This is all to say I hope we stop asking other horse people what they do with their horses, but instead simply ask them to tell us about their horses and see what unfolds.

I think the answers we give and receive would be so much more meaningful. ✨

Check in time! 👀

We all know that there are at least a zillion videos, courses, and clinics that focus just on trailer loading.

It makes sense. It's a big ask for a horse!

You're literally asking a prey animal to walk into and stand quietly in a dark, metal, moving box and be totally okay with it.

Training methods aside (because that is a whole different can of worms), one of the biggest mistakes I see across equestrians of all backgrounds when it comes to trailer loading is...

They don't continue to practice the behavior! 🤯

Seriously! It seems so silly, but I'm shocked by how many people don't continue to practice loading and unloading after they think their horse has gotten it down.

So if you're working on trailer loading now or have a horse that has struggled to load in the past, I'm begging you to keep practicing whenever you get the chance.

I try to practice this with Annie at least once a month at different times of the day to keep her loading skills sharp. And peep her Transport Air hoof boots by @cavallohoofboots that we use for additional shock absorption in the trailer!

If you have access to a trailer, even if you're not going anywhere, check in with your horse's loading skills regularly! 🐴

This is what I stand for ✨️

Even if I can't put into words exactly what I do with horses, I can definitely tell you how I go about it.

Regardless of where I am at any given moment in my horsemanship journey, these three core elements are at the heart of my way of being with horses.

🧬 Science
🧘🏻‍♀️ Soul
🧠 Self

I am committed to the neverending pursuit of expanding, understanding, and applying these pillars of practice for my horses, my community, and myself.

What's at the heart of your horsemanship? 🦄

Realignment in progress ✨

What was supposed to be a weeklong break from social media quickly became a two-month hiatus. 😅

It wasn't until I truly allowed myself to rest that I realized how burnt out I was.

And the longer I've been away, the harder it's been to post.

I've really felt like I have been living in limbo these last couple of months as I figure out my next steps forward in various areas of my life.

I discussed this with my amazing therapist last night and had a good cry when I realized I'm still very much living in a loop of not feeling like I am enough.

❌ Not experienced enough.

❌ Not unique enough.

❌ Not thin enough.

❌ Not good enough.

As an only child, I grew up surrounded by adults who didn't always value my thoughts and feelings due to my age. On the other hand, I felt too mature around kids my own age.

This has shown up in my business where I don't feel good enough to play in the sandbox with other equestrian professionals, but I also know I have so much knowledge and insight to share.

It was also during this hiatus that I was moving through the second half of The Intuitive Equestrian program with @felicitydavies_ and reawakening a power in myself that I didn't know I had. 🦄

And it's that very power that has forced me to reckon (for the millionth time and certainly not the last) with my way of being with horses.

I realized that I actually don't like the label "trainer" anymore. Even with thoughtfully applied positive reinforcement, the term itself feels so rigid to me now.

I haven't quite figured out what the words are that describe what I do yet, but the core pillars of who I am and what I do are still science, soul, and self.

What I do know, however, is that I've decided to call this moment in time the realignment phase. And I'm so thankful for each and every one of you who has and will join me on this journey.

My offerings will shift as I do to better incorporate all of my knowledge and serve my fellow aligned equestrians, I just haven't yet found the words to describe that either.

So while I'm not quite sure what the future looks like just yet, I'll know it when I feel it and that's good enough for me. 💖

You also don't need to justify it ✌🏻

Equestrians are probably the hardest working people I know and some of the last people who know how to rest.

And I should know... Because I'm one of them! 😅

One thing I always have to remind myself of when I hesitate to hit pause is that you feel comfortable with what is familiar because familar is often safe.

The opposite is just as true - you feel uncomfortable with what's unfamiliar because unfamiliar is often unsafe.

So if mindful rest is not familiar to you, it's going to feel weird! 😬

But if you never familiarize yourself with how it truly feels to rest, it'll never feel safe.

You deserve to make yourself feel safe just as much as I know you want to make your horse feel safe.

And neither of you need to earn it. 💕

Must-have tools for your R+ toolbox! 🧰

Maybe you've seen or read about positive reinforcement training and you're ready to try it with your horse, but you don’t know where to start! 🤷🏻‍♀️

You know R+ training involves a lot of groundwork so you might think you need at least a halter and lead rope, maybe even a lunge line and a whip or two.

But you really don't need any of those things at all! 🙅🏻‍♀️

When it comes to physical tools to get started with R+ training, I make sure that all of my students have a good amount of their horse's preferred forage pellets and a wearable, easily accessible pouch to put them in at the bare minimum. 🌾

Past that, you may want a clicker or a whistle if you choose to use one of those as your bridge signal (which lets your horse know that they have done what you were asking them for). 🛎

You'll likely want some sort of physical target, too, but you can just as easily teach a horse to target your hand or use something you already have lying around the barn like a fly swatter! 🎯

If you have a REALLY food-motivated horse or a horse who just loves being in your space, protected contact is an invaluable physical tool to have in your toolbox. Having a place where you can work on food manners behind protected contact is a helpful tool not only for your safety, but also for creating clarity in your horse's understanding of how to accept food rewards calmly and without crowding you. 🐎

And last but not least, I recommend having flexible feed pans at the ready! They are also great for teaching your horse food manners in that they learn that they receive their food rewards by staying out of your space. Feed pans can also double as targets! Note that I specifically mention flexible feed pans rather than buckets as they're a safer option should your horse step on them for whatever reason. 😋

These are just the tangible tools to get you on your way, they are not a substitute for the intangible tools you'll want to have, too!

👉🏻My top two intangible tools are an understanding of equine behavior and of learning theory.👈🏻

These intangible tools apply to anyone working with horses at all, not just those interested in R+! 💖

Ask and you shall receive. 🧞

How many times have you heard that phrase?

Personally, I can’t even count. But it was normally used solely in the context where I or someone else was asking a favor of someone.

I had never really thought about it in the sense of looking for answers from myself or from the universe - you know, the more intangible yet innately profound things! 🦄

It wasn’t until I was chatting with Molly of @spirithorsecollective months ago that I really clicked with a different version of that phrase, one that I keep coming back to.

✨ You can’t get answers without asking questions. ✨

She bestowed the essence of this pearl of wisdom when I was explaining that I didn’t really know how to tap into my intuition.

This was also months before I started the Intuitive Equestrian course with @felicitydavies_ where we have been strengthening our relationship to our intuition using - you guessed it, all sorts of questions! 🙋🏻‍♀️

So if you’re stuck wondering about or wanting something, whether it be from another person, yourself, your horse, etc. just ask! I bet you’ll be surprised by the answers you receive.

In this week’s Rewarding Recap you’ll find:

✨ My thoughts on bragging about ourselves

✨ My weekly Annie update

✨ The power of asking

✨ My weekly list of things I'm loving

✨ My Equestrian Reflection journal card pull and response

✨ My theme for the upcoming week based on my intuitive Equestrian Oracle card pull

I can’t fit all the words into an Instagram post so make sure to read the full blog! Saddle up and ride on over to the link in my bio to catch up with me in The Positive Pony blog! 🦄

You know it's called insanity when you keep doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result... right? 😳

It's wild to me how many people on the internet go looking for answers when they're struggling to load their horse on the trailer or to stand still at the mounting block. 🙅🏻‍♀️

They almost always make a point to say they've tried EVERYTHING. 😫

Everything except training the behavior using positive reinforcement, that is! 🥕

I love popping in on those threads and offering R+ as a suggestion - assuming the horse is physically and emotionally prepared for the task at hand!

Even if the person asking for help doesn't try R+ training right away, I'm more than happy to plant the seed and walk away. 🌱

Why? 🤔

Because then maybe next time that person runs into some sort of issue with their horse, they might consider using positive reinforcement training to solve it.

And that's all I can do!

I'll happily keep leading equestrians to the R+ river, knowing that those who are thirsty enough will drink when they're ready, not when the water is dumped on their heads. ✌🏻

One of the biggest myths about R+ horse training! ⚡

Food manners are the cornerstone of a solid R+ foundation for any species. 🍽

Without teaching those manners, horses quickly learn that they can rummage through your pockets to receive a reward.

The whole basis of reinforcement is increasing the likelihood of a behavior.

👉🏻 Whenever you give a reward, you are reinforcing the behavior that happened immediately before you rewarded it. 👈🏻

For example: you give your horse a cue, they perform it, you offer your bridge signal (click, "yes!", etc.), they turn their head and neck toward you, you give them a treat. ❌

You have rewarded them for turning their neck to you to receive the treat, and now they are likely to repeat that behavior moving forward. 😳

To avoid this, it is your job to ALWAYS offer food rewards to your horse in the position you want their head to be in!

Revisiting our example above, you could do this instead:

You give the cue, the horse performs it, you offer your bridge signal, they turn their head and neck toward you to receive the treat you are about to give them, you wait until their head is where you want it (often the head facing straight forward in a relaxed posture), and then you offer the food reward to the horse in that position. ✅️

The other common mistake when teaching R+ is not using food rewards of appropriate value.

If you are offering high value rewards all of the time (like apples, sugary commercial treats, etc.) then it is very likely your horse will be in a constant state of arousal like a kid in a candy store would be! 🍭

If you're working with a horse that isn't very food motivated, that might be a better route to take to increase their engagement, but most horses are thrilled to receive low-value reinforcers such as hay pellets. 🌾

My go-to is timothy hay pellets, which are easy to get at most local feed stores.

Not only are you getting way more bang for your buck compared to commercial treats (hello, horseperson on a budget!), but they're great for keeping forage in the horse's digestive system while training which reduces the risk of ulcers. 😋

Share this post, and let's bust this myth! 🙅🏻‍♀️

Does your horse enjoy being ridden? 🤔

And how do you know that they do?

So many of us question whether or not we even should be riding when we start down the path of learning more about empathetic and ethical horsemanship. 😕

I find that most people on this journey are here because they come across a horse who truly does or did not seem to want to be ridden, leading them to look for alternative and compassionate solutions to the old “push them through it” mentality.

You and I are the same people who likely have had a horse that had very legitimate physical and/or emotional limitations that made riding a huge ask.

I know how it is to then become cautious of what you ask of them moving forward so as to not cause harm, and to apply that thinking to every other horse you meet.

Riding is certainly not natural for the horse in general, and I know you’ve all seen countless examples of riding that are subtle to blatant abuse of the horse. 😮‍💨

But not natural does not necessarily mean bad.

And riding does not have to involve abuse.

Horse’s are inherently generous and they are incredibly honest, so long as you’re willing to really receive and honor their feedback. 💖

👉🏻 Riding is a gift. It is not something you are entitled to. 👈🏻

So yes, I do think plenty of horses (but not all!) can/do enjoy the riding aspect of our relationship when they are prepared, honored, and rewarded for their role in a ridden partnership.

In this week’s Rewarding Recap you’ll find:

✨ Some thoughts about getting to know others better

✨ My weekly Annie update

✨ Thoughts on the ridden horse

✨ My weekly list of things I'm loving

✨ My Equestrian Reflection journal card pull and response

✨ My theme for the upcoming week based on my intuitive Equestrian Oracle card pull

I can’t fit all the words into an Instagram post so make sure to read the full blog! Saddle up and ride on over to the link in my bio to catch up with me in The Positive Pony blog! 🦄

Oh yea, I went there 💅

Training aids don't solve your problems - they only mask them! 😬

Behavioral issues under saddle often stem from one or more of these common situations:

🛑 Not enough access to turnout, forage, and/or friends

🛑 Unaddressed/unresolved pain

🛑 Ill-fitting tack

🛑 Your horse was not properly prepared (mentally or physically) for what you're asking of them

And spoiler alert! 🚨

No amount of gadgets, gizmos, or snake oil supplements are going to address any of those root problems! 👀

Alright, we need to talk about punishment. 🫣

I talk about reinforcement in horse training a lot because I think you should be focusing on what you do want your horse to do, not so much on what you don't want them to do.

Reinforcement means you are either adding something pleasant or taking away something unpleasant to teach your horse to offer you MORE of a desirable behavior. 👍🏻

Opposite of that is punishment.

Punishment is where you are adding something unpleasant or taking away something pleasant to teach your horse of offer LESS of an undesirable behavior. 👎🏻

See the difference?

You get in trouble when you think you're reinforcing your horse, but you're unintentionally punishing them. 😬

I'll use a common example:

You're standing with your horse and they barge into your space. You wave your arms at them to get them to back away.

This often gets labeled as negative reinforcement (pressure + release) because when the horse backs away, you stop waving.

People see this as the horse is showing the desirable behavior (backing away) so you release the pressure, therefore they have learned not to come into your space.

Buuut that's not what's happening! You're actually positively punishing them! 😱

Think about it...

The horse barges into your space (an undesirable behavior).

You wave your arms or shake the lead rope (adding something your horse doesn't like) to get them to back up.

The horse learns that they'll be punished for coming into your space.

Had the horse just been standing there and you waved your arms to ask them to back up, they do, and you quit waving once they have backed up - THAT is true negative reinforcement/pressure and release!

The difference is that you're focusing on seeing more of the desirable behavior of backing up (reinforcement), rather than trying to see less of the undesirable behavior of the horse barging into your space (punishment). 💡

This also happens with positive reinforcement + negative punishment! 🥕

Either way, you can avoid accidentally punishing your horse by getting really clear about if you are looking to see more or less of a behavior when you interact with them! 🦄

This blog post isn't perfect... 👀

And I'm thrilled about it! 😎

It's a long holiday weekend and I've been super busy so far, so rather than stressing out about making this blog post perfect, I focused on making it as simple and to the point as possible.

I often battle perfectionism, so this is actually super tough for me - to feel like I might be putting something out there that could be less than my very best. 😬

But here's the thing, sometimes your best is simply showing up.

And that was my goal at the beginning of the year - was to aim for consistency.

So here I am, being consistent and imperfect and being so dang proud of myself for that. 💖

In this week’s Rewarding Recap:

✨ Why you answer honestly when you're asked how you are

✨ My weekly Annie update

✨ My weekly list of things I'm loving

✨ My Equestrian Reflection journal card pull and response

✨ My theme for the upcoming week based on my intuitive Equestrian Oracle card pull

I can’t fit all the words into an Instagram post so make sure to read the full blog! Saddle up and ride on over to the link in my bio to catch up with me in The Positive Pony blog! 🦄

I'm done "shoulding" all over myself ✌🏻

The other day, it was hot, humid, and the air quality sucked. 🥵

Rather than doing what my training plan said I should be doing, I did what was going to make myself and my horse happy.

And that was giving her a bath to cool her off and letting her stand in front of the fans while I braided her mane.

I smiled ear to ear as I nourished the little horse girl in me who wanted to adorn Annie's mane with wild flowers. 🌼

It's not that training and riding aren't fun, but they often can feel like things I "should" be doing with my horse.

👉🏻 But the thing is, we're human beings, not human doings. 👈🏻

Life is not about what you or your horse do. It's about who you are. 🦄

Both you and your horse are your best selves when you connect to your joy, to your passion.

And more often than not, that connection looks nothing like what other people tell you it "should" look like.

Embrace it! 💖

Help - my confidence abandoned me! 😱

Sound familiar?

Because it does to me!

I knew I had to talk about confidence with y'all when a fellow equestrian posted in a FB group looking for tips and tricks to cultivate their confidence in the saddle.

Good, bad, or indifferent, the confidence crisis is all too common in the equestrian world and I am intimately aware of that.

Both from my personal experiences and from the experiences of my students who have all lacked confidence in one area or another.

And it doesn't even need to be about lacking confidence in the saddle!

I know plenty of equestrians who are super confident riders but aren't at all confident in their groundwork skills or equine management.

Either way, so many of us struggle with our confidence levels for various reasons but some of the most common ones I've come across are:

⚡ You've had a traumatic experience for either horse and/or human

⚡ You have an unsupportive and/or unknowledgeable support system

⚡ You're ignoring how you're feeling and overwhelming yourself

⚡ You're comparing yourself to everyone else

No matter what your reason(s), there are steps you can take right now to call your confidence back to you!

💖 Cultivate a compassionate and competent support system

💖 Identify what DOES make you feel confident

💖 Spend time with (ride, groundwork, meditation, etc.) with a horse or horses who do make you feel confident

💖 Plan to build your confidence back slowly like you would your horse's

💖 Give yourself grace

There is a reason this topic pops up just as frequently as things like trailer loading and flying lead changes - and it's because so many of us struggle with it!

Know that you are not alone.

Know that there are steps you can take to get where you want to go.

Know that your tribe is out there.

And know that if you need help, all you need to do is ask. 🫶🏻

Anyone else feeling a huge shift in energy this week?! ☀️

We're finally experiencing the heat up here in Vermont, but the Summer Solstice made for a ride I won't soon forget.

It was short, but it was really freaking sweet and I'm eternally grateful for Annie and for the relationship we have built.

If you saw my reel from Friday, you'll know why (and if you haven't seen it, what the heck are you waiting for? Go watch that and then read the new blog post 😉).

We are in such a different place than we were even just a year ago, but especially since we first became partners.

This sentiment of reflecting on where we have been came up in all of the lessons I taught this week, interestingly enough.

I'm not sure if it was the energy of the solstice or what that caused such a theme of reflection, but it was definitely a good reminder to take stock of where you have been with your horse, but also to really lean into where you are now.

Either way, you're right where you need to be. ✨

Trust that if that feels good, you're meant to appreciate that without looking for the bad. 💖

Trust that if that feels bad, you're going to get through this and inevitably there will be some lesson in whatever you're going through. 🫶🏻

In this week's Rewarding Recap:

✨ My thoughts about the lessons so many of us are collectively unlearning

✨ My weekly Annie update

✨ Why being a "fixer" isn't all it's cracked up to be

✨ My weekly list of things I'm loving

✨ My Equestrian Reflection journal card pull and response

✨ My theme for the upcoming week based on my intuitive Equestrian Oracle card pull

I can’t fit all the words into an Instagram post so make sure to read the full blog! Saddle up and ride on over to the link in my bio to catch up with me in The Positive Pony blog! 🦄

It wasn't always this easy ❤️‍🩹

Annie and I found each other as I was accepting the reality that my late gelding, Jäger, was nearing the end of his life.

I had grand plans for us after riding her a few times before committing to purchasing her.

But everything changed when I brought her home to our first barn. 🫣

Where she lacked confidence before, she was now completely riddled with anxiety.

Yes, we made progress, but it was the one step forward, two steps back kind of progress.

It's was disheartening as ever. 😮‍💨

Nothing in my toolbox was helping.

I wanted to give up after the third time I fell off of her when rather than bolting or bucking like she had before, she tried to lay down with me on her.

I knew something was wrong. I knew we needed to try something different.

Since then, it's been three years and so much has changed.

✨️I learned about + use as much positive reinforcement in our training as possible.

✨️Annie has been treated for Lyme disease.

✨️We moved barns so she could live outside 24/7 with freedom, forage, and friends.

✨️Her diet is designed to balance her forage and support her individual needs.

✨️We've learned how to use the power of various modalities of body and energy work, and the Balance Through Movement Method.

✨️We've had our saddle built and fitted by qualified professionals, and we ride entirely bitless.

✨️I go to therapy.

✨️I started working out.

✨️I practice yoga to gain strength and flexibility while also learning breath work techniques.

✨️I've learned and worked with a ton of amazing people to make myself the best version of myself I can be for Annie.

I'm open to things that I never would've given the time of day before.

Had it not been for her, I wouldn't be here.

I fully admit that I still have moments of doubt and fear because of where we have been.

But I know that I needed Annie to shatter me so that we could put the pieces back together in a way I never thought possible.

I have faith in where we are going, even if it looks slow.

I have a trust in her and in myself that I didn't have before.

For all that, I'm endlessly grateful. 💖

And I know you can get here, too. 🫶🏻

If you're on the fence about trying R+ training you *need* to read this! 👇🏻

You don't need to (and quite honestly, shouldn't) switch all of your training to positive reinforcement overnight! 👏🏻

I've chatted with lots of people who don't start incorporating R+ into their training because they believe that means they need to only train with R+, rather than using a blended approach that utilizes both the least intrusive, minimally aversive (LIMA) R-, or pressure and release, training in combination with R+.

This is SO far from the truth, my friends! 🦄

I don't want you to hold yourself back from trying this new way of doing things just because you worry you have to go 0 to 100 right away, that's a totally unreasonable expectation to put on yourself and your horse.

Chances are, your horse was initially trained with R-, so imagine if you all of the sudden threw them into the deep end only using R+. They're going to think you're speaking a totally different language all of the sudden and not know why! 😵

There is a lucky group of trainers out there who have had the opportunity to start their horses entirely with R+, but that's definitely the exception, not the rule.

The rest of us, have to back way up to the very beginning to help our horses, and ourselves, start learning the language of R+. 📚

What is great about that is we can split out time teaching them this beautiful alternative to traditional R- training, while also balancing it with riding how you normally would or working on other things with pressure and release - so long as what you're doing is working for your horse.

What creates confusion and frustration for our horses is when we aren't being consistent. And that's true of using R- and R+!

If you're going to start R+ training, you can set your horse and yourself up for success by choosing certain cues that you will consistently ask for with either R+ or R-.

Over time, you can choose to teach more R+ cues to replace R- cues if that feels right. 🥕

You can also choose certain types of work (active rest days, liberty sessions, etc.) to be R+ focused, too. 🐎

Either way, I'd rather see you use a little R+ than not at all!

Happy training! 💖

A day late, but it’s here! 😅

After a weekend full of family/adult commitments, I was totally wiped by the time it came to sit down and write this week’s recap. 🥱

And again, I realized I had an opportunity to break my old cycles of pushing through my exhaustion and making the thing happen in favor of choosing rest. So that’s exactly what I did!

But in the name of consistency, I still showed up for myself today when I had more time and energy to write a blog that I am proud of rather than putting out something relatively lame (no horse pun intended!).

The deadlines we set for ourselves, especially when it comes to horses, are often self-imposed and based on what we think we “should” be doing, without accounting for the realities of life.

So let this serve as a reminder that choosing to take care of yourself and/or your horse first does not mean you are giving up on your goals so long as you make your way back to them. It just means you are flipping off the systems and narratives that tell you that you’re failing when you just need a little break. 😎

And that is what it means to get back on the horse - you do it when you’re ready, not when someone or something else demands that you do to keep up appearances. ✌🏻

Without further ado, in this week’s Rewarding Recap you’ll find:

✨ Some thoughts around deadlines

✨ My challenge for you (and myself!) regarding goal setting

✨ Why you can’t surprise yourself without doing things differently

✨ My weekly Annie update

✨ My weekly list of things I'm loving

✨ My Equestrian Reflection journal card pull and response

✨ My theme for the upcoming week based on my intuitive Equestrian Oracle card pull

I can’t fit all the words into an Instagram post so make sure to read the full blog! Saddle up and ride on over to the link in my bio to catch up with me in The Positive Pony blog! 🦄

Some of y'all don't know what healthy love is, and it shows 🫡

For real, though.

I don't doubt that people love their horses, I really don't.

But hitting someone you love, isolating them, and/or using tools on them that inflict pain because they're not doing what you want them to do is not okay. 🙅🏻‍♀️

What is sad to me is that so many equestrians still do not understand how their horse learns which means they don't understand why punishment does nothing but damage your relationship with your horse. 😔

So many equestrians still do not understand how their equipment works and how even the softest of hands can't change the mechanics of certain types of bits and bridles.

If you really love your horse in a way that is healthy, you'll seek to understand them, not to punish them for being horses and expressing themselves as such.

If you really love your horse in a way that is healthy, you need to learn how to set and enforce your boundaries without needing to physically or emotionally harm the horse.

If you really love your horse in a way that is healthy, you'll take the time it takes to teach them what you'd like them to do in the mildest equipment possible that is also designed for their comfort, not band-aid "bad behavior" with whatever quick fix supplement, bit, or training "aid" is hot right now.

While I'd love to see everyone learning how to use positive reinforcement with their horses to reward them for all of their hard work and generosity, I'd settle for the industry shifting away from crazy equipment and aggressive training tactics designed to shut down the horse when they're simply trying to communicate with you. ✌🏻

How you train your horse impacts how they feel! ✨

Last week, we explored the 7 emotional systems that neuroscientist and psychobiologist, Jaak Panksepp, defined as a set of universal circuits of emotion.

Today, I'll overlap those emotional systems with behaviorist BF Skinner's operant conditioning model.

Recap time!

Quadrants of Operant Conditioning:
🧠 Positive (Add)
🧠 Negative (Subtract)
🧠 Reinforcement (Increases behavior)
🧠 Punishment (Decreases behavior)
🥕 Appetitive (Pleasant)
🔥 Aversive (Unpleasant)

Emotional Systems:
🧐 Seeking (Pleasant)
🥳 Play (Pleasant)
😘 Lust (Pleasant)
🤗 Care (Pleasant)
😳 Fear (Unpleasant)
😱 Panic (Unpleasant)
😡 Rage (Unpleasant)

Now how do those two things come together? Here's my perspective!

R+ 👉🏻 PLEASURE (Seeking | Play | Care)
The horse experiences pleasure by being rewarded with something they enjoy/want.

R- 👉🏻 RELIEF (Seeking | Fear | Panic | Rage)
The horse seeks and experiences relief from something they do not enjoy/want.

P+ 👉🏻 ANXIETY/TERROR (Fear | Panic | Rage)
The horse experiences anxiety and/or terror because they do not want to experience punishment.

P- 👉🏻 CONFUSION (Seeking | Fear | Panic | Rage)
The horse experiences confusion because they do not know how to be rewarded with what they enjoy/want.

I believe that it's *super* important to note that these two systems were not intended to be congruent and this way of thinking about them is my opinion.

Behavioral science and learning theory are great roadmaps to understanding, but are not the be-all, end-all of training. There are so many beautiful complexities to all areas of life, and horse training is no exception.

I wholeheartedly believe that, like 99% of all other internet advice, many statements I make here are generalizations and cannot possibly account for each individual - horse or human!

What may make me and my mare, Annie, feel good and learn our best is likely not exactly what makes you or your horse feel and learn your best.

After all, learning and emotions can't possibly be 💯 black and white!

If people didn't change their minds we'd still be believing/doing some pretty wild stuff! 😬

I'm not sure why people think it is such a terrible thing to change their minds about things (political repercussions or simply the fear of being wrong occasionally, perhaps?) but I think we can agree that we as humans would be a heck of a lot less advanced than we are now if not for being open to changing our views and ways!

But I know that if I didn't change my mind about things, I would not be here writing this to you right now!

🛑 I used to believe that horse needed to "respect" me.

🛑 I used to believe that some horses were inherently "naughty" or wanted to "test" me.

🛑 I used to believe that horses knew what they were doing and were intentionally out to get me when they were "being bad."

Had I not been open to really learning about equine/animal behavior, pain science, species-appropriate management, positive reinforcement training, etc. etc. I would not be here right now.

👉🏻 Being brave enough to be open to endless possibilities, being willing to be wrong, and genuinely wanting to learn more is how you allow yourself the space to change your mind - whether that is in regards to horses or about anything else. 👈🏻

And changing your mind can be exactly what you need sometimes. 💖

In this week’s Rewarding Recap you'll read all about:

✨ A deeper look into why it can be good to change your mind

✨ My weekly Annie update including a mini recap our visit with our amazing bodyworker

✨ My weekly list of things I'm loving

✨ My Equestrian Reflection journal card pull and response

✨ My theme for the upcoming week based on my intuitive Equestrian Oracle card pull

I can’t fit all the words into an Instagram post so make sure to read the full blog! Saddle up and ride on over to the link in my bio to catch up with me in The Positive Pony blog! 🦄

It is REALLY freaking hard not to compare your journey to the next person's! ✨️

Yes, comparison is surely the thief of joy, but to some extent, it's completely normal.

Comparison allows you to take stock of where you are, where you've been, and where you want to go. It can be a great way to measure growth! 🌱

Comparison can inspire you to try things that gave others a certain desirable result. It can be incredibly motivating! 🏃🏻‍♀️

Where comparison becomes a problem, though, is when you become hyperfocused on what you think you "should" be doing rather than doing what feels right for you and your horse or beating yourself up when what works for someone else isn't working for you. 🙅🏻‍♀️

You and your horse are on your own unique timelines. 💕

You each have your own unique superpowers and areas for growth (which you wouldn't be able to name without some level of comparison!). 🦄

Give yourself and your horse a little grace.

Know that you're right where you're meant to be.

Know that there is always something to learn from the situation you're in.

And know that so long as you have your horse, you have something to be grateful for. 💖

Do you know if the way you train your horse makes them feel good? 🤔

Emotional Systems, as observed and researched around 1998 by neuroscientist and psychobiologist, Jaak Panksepp, are a set of universal mammalian circuits of emotion.

He observed and defined 7 emotional systems:
🧐 Seeking
🥳 Play
😘 Lust
🤗 Care
😳 Fear
😱 Panic
😡 Rage

Panksepp stimulated the subcortical (primitive functions - often called the lizard brain) and the cortical (higher-level functions such as decision-making and language) areas of the brain to prove that it is the subcortical regions that produce observable emotions across all mammals.

These emotional systems serve the purpose of protecting or developing ourselves and/or the others within our herd to ultimately ensure our survival.

👍🏻 Seeking, Play, Lust, and Care are appetitive, or pleasant, emotional systems.

👎🏻 Fear, Panic, and Rage are aversive, or unpleasant, emotional systems.

And while the emotional systems are labeled as aversive or appetitive, there are situations where extreme expressions of a specific emotional system are observed.

This means it is possible for some systems (Seeking, Lust, and Rage) to cross into the opposite territory (appetitive systems can become aversive, aversive systems can become appetitive) under certain circumstances.

Why is this so important? 🧐

Each of the emotional systems is associated with one of the four operant conditioning quadrants (R+, R-, P+, and P-).

👉🏻 Which ultimately means that the way you choose to train your horse has the power to impact their emotions - for better or worse! 👈🏻

Be honest with me... 👀

How frequently are you celebrating YOUR wins?

And I don't mean your horse's wins! (But I hope you're celebrating those, too!!) 🐴

Maybe it's silly but one of the best ways I can get my brain to wrap itself around self care and personal growth is to treat myself like I'd treat Annie. 💖

And that's not just with rest, bodywork, working with other professionals, etc.

I can apply that perspective to just about anything, including dealing with imposter syndrome like I know so many of you do alongside me!

You've got to commit to celebrating you own wins of all shapes and sizes, areas where you can see your growth even if it may not feel like much. 🍾

It's also about sharing your wins, no matter how big or small, with the people who you know care so that they can celebrate with you. 🥳

Your cheerleading section can't cheer you on if they don't know you're out playing the game!

So I'm challenging you to celebrate your wins this week, and for bonus points, share a win with a friend and let them celebrate you like you'd celebrate your horse and their wins! 🙌🏻

And now, without further ado, inside this week’s Rewarding Recap you'll find:

✨ A conversation about imposter syndrome sparked by my weekly We're Not Really Strangers prompt

✨ My weekly Annie update and how we navigated the highs and lows of this week

✨ My mini recap of week two of the Intuitive Equestrian where I started practicing my animal communication skills

✨ My weekly list of things I'm loving

✨ My Equestrian Reflection journal card pull and response

✨ My theme for the upcoming week based on my intuitive Equestrian Oracle card pull

I can’t fit all the words into an Instagram post so make sure to read the full blog! Kick down your stall door and gallop over to the link in my bio to catch up with me in The Positive Pony blog! 🦄

That's it, that's your reel for today 🤣

But for real, this is your reminder that freedom, friends, and forage are what make for strong, healthy, happy horses! 🐎

#thepositivepony #positivereinforcement #positivereinforcementtraining #positivereinforcementhorsetraining #clickertraining #clickertraininghorses #horse #horsetraining #horsetrainer #forcefree #forcefreetraining #horsemanship #naturalhorsemanship #equestrian #groundwork #ethicalequestrian #ethicalhorsemanship #ethicalhorsetraining #relationshipbeforehorsemanship #clickercowgirl #clickercowgirls

We need to talk about coddling. 👀

You hear it all the time with kids, dogs, and horses - “don’t coddle them!” 🙅🏻‍♀️

Time and time again I see people put down R+ trainers for being "too soft" on their horses under the assumption that they ‘coddle’ their horses into oblivion.

First of all - we need to define the word because it’s one of the first to get thrown out in debates over horse training practices.

📚 Coddle [verb (used with object)]: to treat tenderly; nurse or tend indulgently; pamper.

Drilling down a little deeper into that, the definition of ‘tenderly’ is “in a soft and gentle way; sensitively or carefully, as to avoid pain.”

So here’s my bone to pick! 👇🏻

Why the heck is it wrong to treat your horse in a sensitive, gentle way, as to avoid causing them pain?! 😖

And by this very definition, you could just as easily coddle your horse with R-/pressure and release if the pressure applied is non-escalating and mild enough as to not cause pain.

The problem lies in the negative connotations that surround the word coddle.

It seems to have taken on this warped meaning in both the parenting and animal training world that demonizes empathy for the other being and their experiences without boundaries.

Do some people take things too far? Of course!

I’ve certainly seen people turn to R+ wanting to create rewarding relationships with their horses but then do not feel safe setting their own boundaries, causing them to end up in danger, or they don’t feel safe expanding their boundaries, causing their world to become very small.

But at the end of the day, I can’t (and won’t!) argue with anyone who doesn’t want to intentionally hurt their horse in pursuit of our own silly human endeavors. 🦄

Because you can learn to set and expand the boundaries that keep both you and your horse safe while also not causing either of you harm. And you can do so with both R+ and R-!

This is all to say that it’s not the positive reinforcement training that’s an excuse to coddle your horse, in fact I don’t think you need an excuse at all. 💖

I hope those of you with a long weekend are enjoying it as much as I am! 😎

The weather has been gorgeous here and I’ve been trying to soak up every minute of it, hence my late posting. 😅

I’ll keep this brief because, like I said, it’s late and I’m pooped but there is some really cool stuff in this week’s blog post that I really hope y’all go through the trouble of reading.

But if not, your loss! 😉

In this week’s Rewarding Recap:

✨ My thoughts and discoveries from week one of The Intuitive Equestrian Level 1

✨ The most amazingly cool thing that happened between Annie and I as a result of our homework

✨ My weekly Annie update

✨ Some thoughts on the importance of balance in our horses

✨ My weekly list of things I'm loving

✨ My Equestrian Reflection journal card pull and response

✨ My theme for the upcoming week based on my intuitive Equestrian Oracle card pull

I can’t fit all the words into an Instagram post so make sure to read the full blog! Slide like a reining horse into the link in my bio to catch up with me in The Positive Pony blog! 🦄

You start at the beginning, not the end! ⏪️

How many times have you seen someone doing something absolutely amazing with their horse and thought to yourself how cool it would be to do that, too?! 🙋🏻‍♀️

You go out to your horse and start trying to do the thing just to be met with frustration or confusion when things aren't unfolding how you expected them to.

You end up creating a narrative that you're just not as good as them or that you'll never get to that point because it feels like you just plain suck at whatever it is you're trying to do. 😮‍💨

The problem lies in that you never got to see behind the curtain in the first place. You don’t often see all of the hard work, dedication, and struggle that other equestrian had to go through to get to the result you saw!

Even with the best horse and the best coach, chances are you're probably going to suck the first few times you try something new!

So many of us equestrians are perfectionists (myself included!) and we struggle with allowing ourselves to be a little messy when we learn new things. 😬

You beat yourself up for not doing the thing just right on the first couple tries, or worse, you don't try at all because you know you won't be "good enough" right out of the gate.

The great thing about horses is that they're typically so forgiving of us and of our mistakes! 🦄

I hope you're willing to suck at something new for the sake of your own and your horse's long-term happiness, whether that be trying positive reinforcement training or switching disciplines.

Because you don't get good at something in the end without allowing yourself to suck in the beginning! 💖

Unpopular opinion time! 👀

👉🏻 Just because someone hires me to work with them doesn't mean I believe that I know that person or their horse any better than they do. 👈🏻

I also don't think it's my job to make them think that I do!

As a horsemanship coach, I can say that I have learned more from listening to my students than I have from any book, clinic, or course.

I thrive when I get to connect to other empathetic horse people one-on-one.

It's in that setting that I can create a really personal space to hold all of you.

All of your thoughts, feelings, and opinions that you may not have felt safe enough to voice elsewhere.

I believe my students thrive because of this, too. 💞

It doesn't mean I will always agree with everyone when they use their voice or that I expect everyone to always agree with me when I use mine. 🙅🏻‍♀️

What it does mean, however, is that when you don't create a space where others feel safe to speak from their hearts, you're cutting both parties off from an opportunity for growth and deeper understanding - ya know, that very thing we're always looking for with our horses. 🦄

🗣 If you're concerned about something with yourself or your horse, I want to hear it!

🗣 If you have an idea to try something even if it may seem a little far-fetched, I want to hear it!

🗣 If a feeling is coming up and you're not sure how to handle it, I want to hear it!

Because in my experience, the best horse professionals are those who want to really hear and understand what you have to say so that they can best serve you and your horse.

And they can't do that if you don't use your voice!

It's like going to your doctor and expecting them to figure out what is going on with your body without telling them any of your symptoms.

You may have had a bad experience with another doctor who didn't seem to care what you had to say or made assumptions without your input, but that doesn't mean that your voice doesn't matter.

The same thing goes for you when you work with a trainer, instructor, vet, farrier, bodyworker, etc.!

I rely on you using your voice.

Your horse relies on you using your voice.

So use it - even when it shakes. 💖

So I have to ask, did you notice?! 🫣

I’m outing myself for the sake of transparency and in the name of being human but did you notice that I didn’t get last week’s Rewarding Recap posted yesterday? 😬

The cool thing about consistency here is that a few of you actually reached out to ask me if everything was alright. 🥹

And while I wasn’t alright (you’ll have to read the blog to find out why 😉), it ended up causing me to shift gears and really lean into what it means to be juggling all of these balls as a one-woman show.

It’s funny (interesting, not ha ha), I know that these are my least exciting social media posts but I personally really enjoy writing these recap blogs.

I’m excited to go back through them all at the end of the year and see how our year has progressed, to see what I’ve learned and learned from.

I think the biggest thing I’ll learn from this week is that the world didn’t come crashing down because I didn’t post this on Sunday - although it clearly caused Instagram to crash! 🤣

Without further ado, this week's Rewarding Recap covers:

✨ Why I dropped the ball here, why I’m totally okay with that, and what you can learn from it

✨ My (super awesome!) Annie update

✨ My weekly list of things I'm loving

✨ My Equestrian Reflection journal card pull and response

✨ My theme for the upcoming week based on my intuitive Equestrian Oracle card pull (and it could not be more perfect!)

I can’t fit all the words into an Instagram post so make sure to read the full blog! Levade like a Lipazzaner and spring on over to the link in my bio to catch up with me in The Positive Pony blog! 🦄

Behavior 👏🏻 is 👏🏻 communication!!!

And I'll say it until I'm blue in the face!

Your horse, as much as we wish they could, can't speak, so they do what they can to help you figure out what they need or want. 🗣

They subtly talk to you all the time. You just have to learn how to listen!

Unfortunately, many of us aren't taught how to really hear our horse's language except for when they resort to yelling using extreme behaviors such as ear pinning, biting, bucking, and rearing. 😬

Horses don't act like that for fun or because they're out to get you.

I promise that they don't want to have to do those things to get you to listen to them.

So please, stop trying so dang hard to be a great horse whisperer and instead learn to become a great horse listener. 💖

The secret to getting rich quick with horses is... 🤑

Doing things that they want to do!

Okay okay, I know you wanted an actual financial tip there but I'm not talking about your real bank account - we're talking about your relationship bank account that you share with your horse. 🐴

This concept has become pretty popular among various horse trainers over the last few years and has been referred to in a few different ways as either the emotional, trust, or relationship bank account.

But the idea is the same no matter the name!

You are either making deposits into the bank account by doing things that cause your horse to have a positive associations with you. ➕

Or you are taking withdrawals from the bank account by doing things that cause your horse to have a negative associations with you. ➖

The goal here is to treat your relationship bank account more like a savings account than a checking account.

👉🏻 You should be making frequent deposits and only making withdrawals when you absolutely need to. 👈🏻

The best part about this is that unlike the silly human world with silly human money, it's actually pretty easy to make relationship bank account deposits!

You just need to do anything your horse enjoys so they learn that for the most part, good things happen when you're around. 🤩

This can be as simple as going to the barn just to groom them (assuming they enjoy it!), planning extra time to hand graze them before and after your lessons, or bringing them some extra hay and placing it somewhere different for variety. 🌾

You can always get even more creative by playing simple enrichment games with them or taking trail walks with them if that is their idea of fun!

All of those things that may seem little to us really add up and make a difference to them, ultimately improving your relationship with them.

So while these tips probably won't make your actual bank account grow, they'll definitely help make you rich when it comes to your relationship with your horse! 💖

Comment and share your favorite ways to make deposits into your relationship bank account with your horse! 👇🏻

Mercury in retrograde anybody? 😅

So I don't know how much you believe in astrology, but I definitely understand why people curse Mercury in retrograde and especially after the weird shifts in energy I've been feeling over the last week after the lunar eclipse.

I've felt it in my personal, equestrian, and professional life and "roller coaster" doesn't seem to even begin to cover it!

I'm not sure if any of you out there reading this are resonating with that, but if you are, I can only hope that you're hanging in there with me.

Because after all, who are we without a little adversity? ⛰️

In this week's Rewarding Recap:

✨ My weekly Annie update and a reminder about comparison

✨ My experience being “too emotional”

✨ My weekly list of things I'm loving

✨ My Equestrian Reflection journal card pull and response

✨ My theme for the upcoming week based on my intuitive Equestrian Oracle card pull

I can’t fit all the words into an Instagram post so make sure to read the full blog! Zoom like a new foal in spring over to the link in my bio to catch up with me in The Positive Pony blog! 🦄

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The Human Behind The Positive Pony

Hi, I'm Cassie! I'm so honored you're here.

The Positive Pony emerged from my longing for compassionate support in navigating the realms of positive reinforcement training (clicker training) and forging profound spiritual connections with horses.

I'm here to share my continuously evolving experience and expertise, aiming not only to instruct but also to create a nurturing space for you to explore and foster an extraordinary relationship with both yourself and your horse.

At The Positive Pony, it's all about you—discovering your divine connection in partnership with these magnificent animals and cultivating it through a distinctive blend of science, soulful understanding, and personalized, heartfelt coaching.